_____________________________________________________

Once upon a time a 15 yr old boy in school uniforms was walking home down a paddy field. The path is narrow and as he walked he came across a 4 year old girl dragging a huge cow after her. The kid was too little for the cow, but she had a kind of spunk, a fearlessness, an expression that even if she were a retard, which she seemed to be, her spunk contradicted the survival instinct that is supposed to govern human existence. The boy looked on lost in the myriad thoughts that suddenly exploded upon him. The boy now felt like hiding his emotions from the kid, he didn’t want to hurt her with his thoughts about her retardation and the sympathy a part of him grossly felt for her. He tried to cover up everything with his smile, which in spite of everything had a warm spontaneity. He needn’t have bothered because the little girl non-nonchalantly walked by and smiled at the boy as she crossed him with the most beautiful bejeweled spectacularly innocent smile ever known to him. She liked him and appreciated the fact that he noticed her in her spunk, their souls probably met unknowing to themselves.

Ever since the boy harbored an unrequited love in his heart for that little girl. Even though his heart pines with an uncontrollable love for the girl he knew that he could never have possessed her like his heart yearned. It got so bad that as he walked up his driveway there was a huge lump in his throat and he fought to restrain his tear glands that were stinging like mad. He started doubting if he was a perverted pedophile of some sort. His already messed up sexual orientation was further complicated by this yearning. He knew even then that time would teach him to deal with it but time couldn’t teach him to forget the love stirred by that sight of the little girl naively dragging that huge cow.

_____________________________________________________

 

Sometimes she’ll say something so special and splendid it will make you feel like singing. At these times she reminds me of a clumsy puppy dog, wagging its friendly tail, and walking all over my feet. But then friendly puppy dogs do get lots of people to love them and feed them. Of course, dogs are a little cheaper to feed. Though she is mostly happy and gre­garious her temper can flare if pushed by people who abuse her friendliness or who get too familiar. She can lose her normally pleasant dispositions and let go with a barrage of unexpected plain talk that puts troublemakers’ right where they belong.

She plunges into romance with reckless abandon, but stops short suddenly when marriage is mentioned. She thinks it over, then goes ahead and makes a mistake after careful consideration. It’s a curious fact that when she tells a joke, the timing is slightly off and she fluffs the punch line. December born people are anyway known to exhibit reclusive habits, but for her this only helps sharpen her wits into genius.

And here’s a secret perhaps she never confessed even to herself: She fell in love with me many years ago, when she was a little girl and had dragged a cow down a paddy field. Since she grew up there were lots of times when she thought she had found me and was disappointed. But when I finally came along, she knew me right away, because I was a gentle clown with a dream or two of my own who took her hand and showed her the way to the stars.

_____________________________________________________