you know i have quiet a shallow mind
the way i see it my life is shallow
so it goes without saying that whatever i say will be shallow
there’s so much drivel in this world
through tv and radio and newspapers and magazines and people
and signboards and neon lights
and car horns and public
announcements and megaphones
I think it wouldn’t hurt to have some more of it
when i watch tv and the screen goes black sometimes
i see my face in it
its kind of funny sometimes and i smile
sometimes its really sad
and once or twice my eyes have cracked to let out a tear
but it doesn’t last
soon enough some sound track comes up on tv and the moment passes
and i gladly let myself get distracted
away from the indecipherable emotion or feeling or whatever
that’s about as profound as life gets for a shallow person like me
the computer screen flickers with the wavelength of an incoming call
the mobile service wants to convert pre-paid to post-paid
they want your money
and prefer it in a steady flow rather than once off payments for refill cards
so i talk to the very polite person at the other end of the connection
that person earns his pay by telling me
about this network that is spreading out in my area
we talk at length and at one point the voice on the other end said thank you
and “good talking to you madam”
and that voice seemed to mean it
it could be call centre training but somehow i felt better for a while
she says that the world has come between us, she says we got nothing in common and that we are falling apart. “our lives have come in between us and i know you just don’t care, anyway.” then the lights went off and we stared at the darkness dumbfounded. the electricity board had pulled our fuse, we were waiting for that. she said once again, “i know you don’t care and anyways we have nothing in common”. so we sat in darkness silent and sullen.
then when there was nothing left to it, i said,
- fuck the government i like it in the dark…
- yeah we got the better of them huhhh…
then we were quiet for some time, smiling soundlessly in the dark
i allowed myself to be born and i take full responsibility of it, i expect other’s to do the same. when someone blames anything for their lives i get cockeyed in my thought and i cant see anything in perspective. i get into arguments with people and all i wanted to do was say what i felt, just express the feeling that blamethrowers invoke in me. doesn’t get anywhere usually! So i usually end up pitying myself and seeking something to blame, and suddenly the whole world seems like the whirlpool in a kitchen sink.
Only wanted to make things right
When I only wanted to make things right
- Lemon Jelly
i keep dropping he t in the
i noticed that happening often in the lines i been writing
wonder what that means
wonder why it happens
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